The transition to Kindergarten is both beautiful and terrifying (for parents and children alike!). There are new routines, friends, learning, and growth to be had by all. . . and even though it might feel scary to let go of your little one’s hand and send them off, it’s a necessary part of their development!

(& PS: if they run off and leave you behind — that’s actually a reason to celebrate! — you raised a confident kid!)

Whether your child skips away from your hug or lingers behind your leg, every reaction to starting school is normal. And remember: your child will always be looking to you for cues and reassurance! As they get ready to start, making sure they know what to expect in kindergarten on their first day is a must.

Here are suggestions for making that transition to Kindergarten as smooth as possible:

Don’t Stop Talking About It!

For the weeks and months leading up to their first day, introduce the idea of ‘school,’ ‘learning,’ and ‘being away from home’ so that they understand what will happen (and most importantly, how long they’ll be away from you).

Children, especially at this age, need a lot of reassurance, and if you make Kindergarten something exciting, you can introduce them to the idea of school without fear or hesitation.

There are so many positives about the transition to Kindergarten and that’s where you should be focusing. If you continue to talk about it and even show them videos online about what kindergarten entails, they’re going to feel well prepared and excited about their first day and not nervous.

Use Stories & Examples

One of the best ways to prepare a child for anything is to show them other children doing the same thing! Social stories can help you because in showing them videos, books, or even looking at the experiences of their friends/siblings/peers/cousins, etc. can help them understand that this is normal (and nothing to fear!).

You can find plenty of resources online or even your local library! One fun idea is to ‘shadow’ a peer on their walk to school. This way you can practice what it will feel like to leave home (and they’ll feel more confident because they can see others doing it, too!).

Take Your Child On A Visit

Continuing with the ‘shadow’ idea, consider a visit or even a ‘drop-in day’ (if possible). Oftentimes teachers will also do a ‘Meet-Your-Teacher-Day’ where families can see the teacher, the space, and get acquainted all before the first day! This ‘preview’ can also help your child meet other peers or get to run around while the parents and teacher talks!

Be Honest About The Negatives

While you want to focus on all of the positive things about the transition to Kindergarten, it’s also OK to address the fact that they may feel shy, nervous, or even afraid. You have to talk about the good and the bad so they won’t feel blind sighted.

Share with your child that you won’t be there, and that you will be coming back to get them. Often younger children struggle with object permanence, so they might feel like you’re never coming back once you leave. Helping them to understand that you will come back is important (and you may even want to help them visualize this on the clock or on a digital watch so they can keep track and learn time, too!)

Another idea is to leave them with a little trinket (bracelet, necklace, charm, tiny toy, stamp, lunchbox note, etc.) so that every time they see it, they can be reminded you love them! A neat idea is to get two of the same object so you can have yours during the day, too, and show them when you pick them up!

The transition to Kindergarten is big for both of you, so don’t worry if you feel big emotions (both you and your child!). However, try to hold back from crying at drop-off so you don’t make them feel scared. You both can take a deep breath and remember that the day will end and everyone will be back together soon!