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THE DIARY OF A BONUS MOM

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my momish moments, diary of a bonus mom

"I didn't give you the gift of life, but life gave me the gift of you."

LATEST MOM HACKS:

person holding plant jar
March 2, 2021

How To Create A More Nature-Infused Home

In our highly-digital world, people are pushing back and embracing both the outdoors, and the ways they can create...

by Cali Anderson
young black boy doing laundry
February 26, 2021

How To (Actually) Keep Your Home Clean

There are ways to (actually) keep your home clean. Sometimes it just takes a little forethought, planning, and involvement...

by Katy Kipper
person renovating house
February 9, 2021

Homeowner Debate: Should You Move Or Improve?

Many homeowners find themselves asking the same question: should we move or improve the home? Here are some practical...

by Katy Kipper
happy woman holding puppy in her house
February 4, 2021

6 Hottest Home Trends To Lust Over This Year

Whether you're renovating or are simply browsing (because it doesn't hurt to look, right?) here are some of the...

by Katy Kipper

See More:

FROM THE HEART:

mother strengthening a bond with her child

5 Ways To Strengthen Bonds With Your Children

by Katy Kipper

Knowing how challenging parenting can be, how do you strengthen bonds with your children, especially when you are new to parenting?

September 9, 2020
From The Heart, Mom Hacks
person supporting a grieving person

How To Support Your Grieving Family

by Katy Kipper

One simple way to support your grieving family is to offer practical assistance (if and when you feel you can).

September 9, 2020
From The Heart
lessons from children

8 Lessons In Healing We Can Learn From Children

by Marisa Donnelly

Perhaps this is one of the greatest lessons from children we must learn — that it's okay to need people. Growth isn't meant to happen alone.

July 14, 2020
From The Heart
My Bonus Mom Story

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Our Unfiltered Life:

If #quarantine has taught us one thing, it's how t If #quarantine has taught us one thing, it's how to be creative in the ample time we have together. 😂 Lol. ⁣
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Seriously, though, one of the things I've appreciated the most about our little family and how we've grown over the past year is that our communication has become the priority. ⁣
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Mad about something? Share it.⁣
Something on your chest? Take the space.⁣
Struggling? It's okay to cry.⁣
Need support? We'll listen.⁣
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We're not a perfect family by any means, but navigating full-time work, full-time homeschool, and full-time caregiving of this little dude has reminded me that if we can get through a freaking pandemic, we can get through anything. ⁣
Maybe it'll never get easier.⁣ Maybe it'll alway Maybe it'll never get easier.⁣
Maybe it'll always be a struggle.⁣
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But that doesn't make it less worth it.⁣
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#stepbystepparents⁣
One of the coolest things I've experienced in my j One of the coolest things I've experienced in my journey is how becoming a #bonusparent has connected (and reconnected) me with such incredible people. ⁣
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This man has been a huge part of my life. To see him become both a father and #bonusdad has warmed my heart in so many ways. The universe has a beautiful way of bringing people together. ❤️ Humbled to share in your joys, laughter, and love, C.⁣
If you learn nothing else on your journey, learn t If you learn nothing else on your journey, learn this — you're going to make mistakes, you're going to lose your sh*t, you're going to be imperfect and flawed, and yes, people will see these things sometimes. But that's okay.⁣
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You'll also have so many moments of joy and healing, you'll also grow, you'll also rebuild and make a difference in the lives you touch. Give yourself grace.⁣
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Parenting doesn't have to look a certain way to be Parenting doesn't have to look a certain way to be beautiful. ⁣
Parenting doesn't have to look a certain way to be real.⁣
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I am reminded of this every time I look at my friend @j_daddy3317 and his daughter. From knowing this man in college, to watching his transformation into a dad, I am humbled and proud to be a witness of his journey. ⁣
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He stepped in, he stepped up, and he is a blessing in this little girl's life. I only hope I to be the same in my family. 💙 #bonusdad⁣
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I read a post once that said, "The hardest breakup I read a post once that said, "The hardest breakup you'll ever go through is the one you go through with your child as he/she grows up." Dang. That hit right in the feels, especially because I met Austin when he was eight. So I've already lost out on a significant portion of his life.⁣
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But, the thing about kids is that yes, they may "breakup" with you. They may fight you. They may push you away. But they will never not need love. And whether they seek that love in others, whether they fall into relationships with their peers, or whether they run in the opposite direction of you for YEARS in pursuit of their own definitions of love, one day they'll realize that the greatest love they'll ever have is yours. ❤️⁣
How has this #backtoschool time shifted your life? How has this #backtoschool time shifted your life? ⁣
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When I realized schools probably wouldn't be back in-person for several months (if not the entire semester or year), I knew I had to do something different with Austin's education. Homeschooling wasn't just an idea, it was a necessary choice.⁣
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So, here we are. One month down. Six crazy kids. And a zillion memories left to make. Here's what I've learned so far: ⁣
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→ ❤️ You'll never be fully prepared for anything in life. Whether that's a homeschool, a change in your day-to-day, or a freaking pandemic, there is no "ready" or "good time." Sometimes life throws you curve balls, and even though you've already struck out 21938 times, you keep going to bat. ⁣
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Because what else is the point of this life than to find your footing, pivot, and keep trying to create happiness right where you are?⁣
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→ ❤️ Kids need stability to thrive. In a time where literally EVERYTHING has been unstable for the past seven months, creating a safe space for them to lean into, trust, and call "home" has been a game-changer.⁣
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→ ❤️ We don't need to be perfect to be qualified. As a recovering perfectionist, I can't say this enough. My students will NEVER remember how that one Friday in September I completely messed up the technology and assignments. But they WILL remember that year they were homeschooled by Austin's "stepmom" and how much fun they had.⁣
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→ ❤️ Life calls you to things. And sometimes no matter how crazy, or how silly, or how downright wild it may seem, you lean in. Because life's too precious not to step outside of your comfort zone and see what happens. ⁣
I struggle anytime someone asks me for my bio. It' I struggle anytime someone asks me for my bio. It's hard to take all the things I'm passionate about and articulate them in a few, short sentences. I'm a business owner, yes. I'm a bonus mom, yes. But I'm also an author, writing coach, content creator, and editor. And now, I'm also a full-time homeschool teacher and advocate for students with disabilities. 🙃 ⁣
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If there's one thing that I've learned in the past three years of fighting for my boyfriend's son's education and rights, it's that just because something "is the way it is" or because it's just "been this way forever" doesn't mean you have to accept it.⁣
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We have the power to change the institutions around us. ⁣
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We have the power to change the narratives around how our children are perceived, taught, celebrated, and loved. ⁣
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Something might not work for my son, but that doesn't mean he is any less capable, smart, or incredible. "Let's find another way." #changeyourapproach⁣
Dear Mama: ⁣ ⁣ You're beautiful just the way y Dear Mama: ⁣
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You're beautiful just the way you are. ⁣
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You're beautiful when you wake up and roll out of bed, in an oversized t-shirt that doesn't flatter your curves. You're beautiful in that tight dress or stained sweatpants. You're beautiful when your hair is brushed, or when it's sticking up in all directions. You're beautiful when you're running your son to his basketball practice, when you're helping your daughter navigate her third tantrum of the morning, when you're making dinner, or when you're handling a business phone call in the small 30 minutes of "free" time you have. ⁣
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You're beautiful when you're doing nothing at all.⁣
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I know some days will feel heavier than others, and on those days, I want you to know that your worth, your value, and who you are is not measured by the things you do or don't do. It's not measured by the words of others. And it's not measured by what you see in the mirror. ⁣
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You are beautiful.⁣
And valuable.⁣
And special.⁣
And worthy.⁣
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Simply because you are you. ⁣
#momishmoments⁣
We're all searching for love. We're all searching We're all searching for love. We're all searching to be heard, to be seen, and to be understood. Last weekend, I sat my boyfriend down and cried to him about how I was feeling, how the energy around me has been heavy since quarantine, and how isolating it can be to be a twenty-something woman navigating the world as a business owner, non-biological mother, and girlfriend-turned-full-time-caregiver in the middle of a freaking pandemic. ⁣
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He gave me the space to cry and he listened, and perhaps more importantly, I gave MYSELF the space to feel, to hurt, to cry, and to let him show up for me in ways that I had grown accustomed to denying. ⁣
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These times are hard. ⁣
For all of us. ⁣
And in different ways. ⁣
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For other mommas like me, ones who don't have a *place* or a *title* or who are navigating what I call the *middle* - not just a girlfriend and not quite a mom or wife, finding your identity and place is so damn difficult. ⁣
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But you can't be hard on yourself. You can't push away the people who are trying to create places for you to grow and thrive. You can't see your vulnerability as weakness or your tears as failure. You have to know that labels don't define you. You have to know that breaks, rest, and putting down your burdens are all okay. ⁣
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You capable and WORTHY of love. ⁣
And no amount of things you do (or don't) will ever change this.⁣
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#momishmoments⁣
#honestmotherhood⁣
"Just when I had finally reached a sense of normal "Just when I had finally reached a sense of normalcy while on maternity leave, it was time to return to work at the end of February. Sometimes referred to as the '5th Trimester,' I think this has been the most difficult transition to date.⠀⠀
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1) Babies Know: The Shark had been sleeping through the night literally until the night before I returned to work when he decided to stay up crying and screaming for 2 hours from 1:30-3:30am. I wake up for work at 5:30... he didn't sleep through the night again until a few weeks ago (just in time for him to begin his 8-month sleep regression, awesome). So, at least I got about a week of solid sleep, right? 🤷🏼‍♀️⠀⠀
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2) Sleep Deprivation: Hit me SO HARD once I returned to work. No longer solely on baby's schedule, now add the rigidity of shift work hours to your life. Oh, and those hours are not synced up to your baby's sleep cycle. Cue minimal sleep for Mom, but somehow manage to function enough to do your job well, let alone do it at all."⠀⠀
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Words: @big.macattack  Thank you for sharing your #honestmotherhood with us. ❤️⠀
Just a reminder that despite the craziness in the Just a reminder that despite the craziness in the world, there is still so much to be thankful for. ❤️⠀
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Last week, I had the pleasure of interviewing Elena Lecrichia, a Labor + Delivery nurse from Stony Brook Hospital (@stonybrookmedicine) about her experience being PREGNANT DURING QUARANTINE. ⠀
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I can't even imagine.⠀
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She shared about so many moments that were different, and yet so many that were beautiful and perfect in their own way. Her perspective was so positive and encouraging! It made me realize that I have SO MUCH to be grateful for. All of us do. [Take a listen to a clip! ⬆]⠀
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Full episode: http://bit.ly/PandemicPregnancy  #pandemicpregnancy⠀
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DAILY MOTHERHOOD QUOTE:

"I thought I knew all the boundaries of myself, that I understood the limits of my heart. It’s extraordinary to have all those limits thrown out, to realize your love is inexhaustible."

Uma Thurman
happy kid smiling between parents

NAVIGATING SPECIAL NEEDS:

What Is A “Pandemic Pod” And Should You Consider One?We desperately needed support to stay above water and community to keep us tethered....August 6, 2020

Homeschool Tips From A Mom Who’s Been In The Game Long Before COVID-19Having made the switch to homeschooling in 2014, my hope is to provide homeschool...April 15, 2020

7 Last-Minute Christmas Gifts For Kids With AutismFinding the right gifts for kids with Autism means understanding the child's unique needs...December 21, 2019

SAN DIEGO, TRAVEL + LIFESTYLE:

mom and child gardening together
Health/Wellness

Simple Ways To Teach Your Children Responsibility

Whether you're a seasoned parent or someone just starting in your journey, here are a few simple ways to teach your children responsibility.

February 25, 2021
happy woman and child walking
Health/Wellness

How To Nurture Positive & Resilient Kids

One of the most challenging (and yet rewarding) aspects of parenting is learning how to nurture positive and resilient kids.

February 22, 2021
dentist cleaning kids' teeth
Health/Wellness

3 Simple Ways To Take Care Of Your Kids’ Teeth

Although brushing is a good start, it’s not enough. Here are a few no-brainer tips to help you take care of your kids' teeth.

February 8, 2021
tips for picky children
Health/Wellness

Healthy Eating Tips For Picky Children

Although the road may be challenging, here are some healthy eating tips for picky children (and ways to keep your sanity along the way!)

November 6, 2020
how to help aging parents
Health/Wellness

How To Help Your Parents As They Age

You can help your parents as they age by advocating for them. Offer to drive and go to their doctor’s appointments with them.

November 6, 2020

“Little souls find their way to you, whether they're from your womb, or someone else's."

Sheryl Crow

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THE DIARY OF A BONUS MOM