They say that what doesn’t kill you will make you stronger, but when it comes to a breakup as an expecting mom, that doesn’t always feel true. While breaking up doesn’t kill you, it sure does feel like the end of everything. Or at least life as you knew it.
Ending a relationship, especially a serious one, is an intense emotional journey. And no matter who you are, how strong you are, or what you’ve been through, you’re never ready for it.
If you’re an expecting mom, however, there is much to consider when going through a breakup. You have to adjust your life and schedule, deal with logistical matters (like moving into a new house), and preparing for the future child’s birth.
But, it’s important to remember that no matter how bad the breakup is, you will get through it. Here are some tips to guide you.
Start (Slowly!) Adjusting To Life Alone
There is security and comfort in being in a relationship. When you’re a couple, you know that you’re not alone — and when you suddenly find that you are alone, the transition can be quite difficult to manage.
It’s best to avoid jumping into another relationship just to avoid feelings of loneliness. They’ll pass in time. Instead, use this newfound freedom to focus on yourself. Starting an exercise regime, starting a new hobby, and taking the time to get to know yourself are all effective ways to spend your single days (long before you even consider meeting/dating someone else).
Focus On Your Pregnancy
It can be challenging to face a breakup alone. It can be terrifying to go through a breakup when you’re pregnant. If you’re in this situation, you know that it’s not just you that you need to worry about, but also your unborn child.
Overcoming the struggles of solo pregnancy can be difficult, but it’s important to remember that there’ll always be support available. Joining a support group, for instance, can have a dramatically positive impact on your experience — there’s no one who will understand what you’re going through better than another pregnant woman.
Work Through Your Trust Issues
In some cases, such as those of infidelity, a break-up can be the catalyst for significant trust issues to develop. You may find it difficult to trust anyone on the basis that someone who you did trust ended up betraying you. Rebuilding your faith in humanity can be challenging, but it’s a journey worth undertaking.
Ultimately, you can’t hold other people accountable for another person’s actions. You can, however, learn the lessons of your previous relationship and look for signs that new people you meet deserve your trust.
Stop Romanticizing Your Past
This one is particularly damaging since it can stop you from moving on. While it’s OK to fantasize that everything will return to how it used to be for a little bit, if it goes on too long (say, more than a week), then it’ll be time to take action.
A good method for managing this aspect of breaking up is to remind yourself of why it ended in the first place. If it’s over, then it clearly wasn’t supposed to be forever. Remembering that your future will be even better than what you had in the relationship can also help!
A breakup as an expecting mom can be heartbreaking, but stay focused on yourself and your baby. The end of a relationship, as hard as it is, can also be a door opening to a better future—for you, and your growing family.